Celebrating Jesus's Last Supper (Maundy Thursday)

This Thursday evening begins the final and most important stretch of Holy Week, which is called the Easter Triduum, lasting from the Maundy Thursday evening meal until the evening of Easter Sunday. The slower pace and simpler eating I mentioned in my earlier Holy Week post especially apply to the Triduum. This is the time to give ourselves plenty of time and space to contemplate the momentous events of these days. 

It's worth mentioning that each of the Gospel writers slows down to a snail's pace as he narrates the final events of Holy Week. Each of these days is described with the greatest care and detail, and so many of the details have to do with the personal interactions Jesus has with individuals. On Maundy Thursday, Jesus hosts a private and sacred meal with just his twelve disciples, and he washes each of his disciples' feet. He prays alone in Gethsemane. Judas betrays him for a bounty—and with a kiss, nonetheless. Peter denies his beloved Jesus. Pilate is unnerved by Jesus's questions and silence. Pilate's wife has a horrible dream and dreads what will come if Pilate convicts Jesus. And so on. 

Gustave Doré, The Judas Kiss (c. 1866)

And there is a reason for this: because these highly personal details are worthy of contemplation. Of turning over and over in our hearts and minds. Of picturing and imagining in our own minds and in our own hearts. Because by doing so, we start to see and hear and taste and smell and touch the events, as if with our own senses. We start to picture ourselves right there in the stories, alongside those other figures who also encountered Jesus in these stories. Perhaps we even begin to experience these stories in a first-person sort of way, as if we are Judas, or Peter, or the grieving and confused women at the tomb on Easter Sunday morning. And by doing so—by encountering Christ on his way to the cross with our own very own eyes—we are able to experience the depth of Christ's sorrow and love for us in a profoundly personal way. And that is the reason I think these final days of Holy Week are worth our extra attention. 

Is a Maundy Thursday (or a Good Friday) service too scary for my child? 
Our church has a service on Maundy Thursday that is really a combination Maundy Thursday/Good Friday service. There are readings from the Gospels, the Lord's Supper is served, and there is a short sermon. The service ends in darkness. I know a lot of people are hesitant to bring their kids to this service. First of all, our service is at 7pm, which is a hard time for really little ones. And I'm not one to push my kids past their bedtimes for just any event, because it's just not worth it for me to have tiny people with big cases of the grumps the entire next day. But for me, these important services in the Christian year are worth it. 

The other reason I've heard that people are nervous to bring their kids to a Maundy Thursday or Good Friday service is because of how heavy and (literally) dark these services can be. I'm only the parent to my own two kids, so I can't say what works for other people's kids. And I can imagine that some kids are just too sensitive for this sort of thing. But I do think that bringing kids to these services can be tremendously productive. One of Dominic's most important childhood memories is of his dad taking him to Ash Wednesday services. He says that he didn't always understand what was happening, but he knew it was very important. I hope the same will be true for our kids.

Last Supper, Byzantine Master (1100), Sant'Angelo in Formis Basilica (Capua, Italy)

So how can we prepare our kids to participate in a Maundy Thursday or Good Friday service? Last year, I prepped Josephine first by telling her what the service was about and how special it is, something like this: "Josephine, tonight we get to go to a very special service at church. We will be remembering and celebrating Jesus's last meal with his disciples, and his prayers alone in Gethsemane, and his betrayal and trial, and his death on the cross." And then I prepared her for the fact of the darkness: "Now, this service is going to be different from normal church services, because it is at night. And as the service goes on, the room will get darker and darker, and at the end, we will all walk out in the dark. The reason it gets darker is because Jesus went into the darkness, in Gethsemane where he prayed alone at night, all through the night while he was on trial, on the cross when it got dark at the time he died, and then in the darkness of the tomb." And of course I reminded her that I would be with her the whole time: "I am looking forward to being in the service right next to you and holding your hand, and I am hoping that you might want to sit on my lap when it starts to get especially dark." I think the important thing to avoid is telling your kids that this is a "scary service," because then they think there's something to be afraid of, and it's over! And last year, Josephine took it all in stride. And with great seriousness. She didn't ask a lot of follow-up questions, I think because she was too tired, but it was definitely something that she was taking in. We'll see how this year goes!

Last Supper in the Home: A Passover Seder?
So that is a big part of how we celebrate Maundy Thursday—just by going to church. But we also like to celebrate at home. Because our service happens on Thursday evening, we like to have a Last Supper meal at home on Wednesday night. We haven't yet incorporated foot-washing into this family meal, but maybe someday we will. So far we have focused mainly on the meal itself. 

Now I know a lot of Christians are very interested in learning to host Passover Seders, and the assumption here is that the contemporary Seder is close to the one that Jesus would have used in his day. But (and I can't help but put on my biblical scholar hat here) the 1st c. CE evidence actually points toward the development of the majority of the Seder customs after the time of Jesus. What Jesus likely practiced was quite close to what is described in the Old Testament passages about Passover. And so we don't try to incorporate, for example, the Seder's four cups of wine that many people have heard of. We try to stick to what can be found in the Bible.

So basically we read the Passover account from Exod. 12:1-39. If I remember correctly, last year this happened while the kids were eating. Maybe this year we will try sitting down at the table and reading Exodus 12 before putting the food on the table; but if food is there, I don't expect little ones to wait. Older kids should have less of a problem! And then as we continue to eat, I casually explained why each of the items in our meal is significant (the unleavened bread or saltine crackers, the lamb, the wine/grape juice, and a dip of some sort).



Then after the meal, we read the Lord's Supper account from one of the Gospels (Matt. 26:17-35; Mark 14:12-31; Luke 22:7-38), and Dominic or I will break the unleavened bread and pour out the grape juice so that we as a family can remember Jesus's institution of the practice of communion. And as we leave the table, I remind them that it is now that Jesus left the table and went to the garden of Gethsemane to pray as he awaited his arrest. And I tell them that Jesus will have a very busy night. He will pray in Gethsemane, he will be betrayed and arrested, he will stand trail before the Jewish leaders and before Pilate, and Peter will deny him three times. (We read as many of these stories as we can on Good Friday morning and throughout the day.)

At bedtime, I like to incorporate some of the words in Jesus's prayer in Gethsemane (Matt. 26:36-46; Mark 14:32-42; Luke 22:39–46; John 17), especially when Jesus prays, "Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from me; but not my will but yours be done." And we talk about how hard it is to obey—to obey parents and teachers, and to obey God. And I remind them that we must pray this prayer over and over, but we will always disobey. But not Jesus: look at him, how he obeys so perfectly. And he does it because he loves us. 

I typed out a script of the kinds of things I say when we have this meal, complete with Scripture references. The script can be downloaded here (the download button is in the top right and is super tiny when viewed on a phone; be sure to zoom in before trying to click!):  

Our Menu
Unleavened matzo bread: Available in the Kosher section of grocery stores like Meijer (for those of us in the Midwest) or from Amazon.  Or just use saltine crackers! Or if you're feeling ambitious, make your own.

Lamb of some sort: This is the only time of year we eat lamb in our household, and we love this recipe for Lamb Meatballs with Spiced Tomato Sauce from NYT Cooking (requires a subscription, but membership is free for the first month). It's most common to roast a lamb shank, although we've never done this. But I know some families just don't eat lamb, and I've heard of people buying a lamb cake mold and baking meatloaf into the shape of a lamb.

Red wine and/or grape juice: fairly self-explanatory.

A dip of some sort: Any kind will do. You could make a dip for the matzos, for your lamb, or even for a side of veggies. The reason we do a dip is that Judas dips his hand into the bowl at the same time as Jesus, and that is how he is identified as Jesus's betrayer. (The Gospels don't say that it was a "dip" that Judas dipped his hand into, but using dip gets the point across in a nice, literal way that kids appreciate.)

Various sides: You can really do whatever you want here, whether you want to cook up a feast or perhaps to keep it a simple weekday meal. In the past, we have made sides that are typical Middle Eastern fare (hummus, tabouleh, olives, etc.). This year, we are just going to have a side of roasted carrots, because the kids love them, and also this delicious looking Middle-eastern-ish Smitten Kitchen Winter Fruit Salad with figs and pomegranate and all sorts of goodies.